June 25th.

Exactly one year ago I was recording my song Girl From Mars under a full Moon. I was in the recording booth and decided to take a break, when my phone rang in my hand. It was Orfeo, telling me about Michael Jackson’s cardiac arrest. I called my mom, Jackson 5 fan from day 1. I called Urdao. I leaned on Win. I went back into the vocal booth, I had to do something, my mind was numb and frantic, woozy and focused, all at once. When they called me back from the vocal booth they told me he had passed away. My knees buckled. I felt like I would dissolve, wash away with my tears, blow away with the sighs of disbelief, eyes wide as if staring harder would help me grasp the news, see it, feel it. I leaned on Win. Mitchell held my hand. Almar hugged me. They all asked me whether I wanted to stop, it would be ok if I wanted to stop, we were all dazed, the world was dazed and you could sense it… I felt I needed to finish, I took a deep breath, reached into my soul and blew it into my song.

Reach In

My mom and I went to all his concerts, I started singing Ben,  Ain’t No Sunshine and I Wanna Be Where You Are at weddings and talent shows when I was 5 (afro wig and everything!), I saw Moonwalker in a movie theatre and I thought it was the most spectacular thing ever… People knew about my mom’s love for MJ and how much I adored him, so it became a running gag that he was my real dad. Growing up without a positive father figure to look up to, I must say this joke wasn’t far from the truth, strange as it may seem. I truly learned how to sing by listening to his songs, over and over again, with my headphones on. I remember my mom telling me to really listen to the way he was feeling the song and made you feel it too. He was my mentor, my idol, my role model. And there’s a good chance he was yours, too. He was the musical father to an entire generation of kids, reminding us that magic is alive, teaching us to love and give. He was magic personified. He is magic.

Music and Me from Moonwalker

I will never forget the day I had the chance to look into Michael’s eyes. It was on his day off during the HIStory tour in Amsterdam. We stood a few feet from him, and he literally glowed, shining as if he were on stage, without any extra lights on him that night but his own. Light emanated from his spirit. It was real. We all saw it. It was as if the universe was following him with a natural spot light. A true star if ever the world knew one. Naturally illuminated.

Music and Me – live

I love you, Michael Joseph Jackson. Thank you for teaching us about music and magic, kindness and humility, sharing your gift and grace with the world. I celebrate your ascension to heaven one year ago, for you are home at last, no longer in search of the world that you came from:

Childhood